How To Stay Well When Overwhelmed While Writing

A few years ago while writing my first book, my life felt like a nightmare. Not just my work-life. My life-life. The problem: crazy amounts of time stressing out in bed instead of working.

I wish I could say I figured it out quickly and want to share my tips. Not so, my friends. I bounced around like a crazy-ass ping-pong ball and it sucked. Luckily, my suffering is your salvation.

I won’t blather on since you’re probably looking for a fast way out of frustration forest if you’re reading this. Besides, I’m a minimalist. So let’s get to it.

Deal With Your Demons

I wish that someone told me that all my s*** would come floating to the surface (which is gross) like I ate oatmeal for breakfast (which I do). They didn’t, but I learned that quickly.

Every negative thing that I could think about myself flew at me on my bad days. You’re too slow. You don’t know what you’re doing. You should have done this yesterday. Nobody cares. And so on. I read all kinds of stuff on preparing to write a book, but I never thought about dealing with that negative voice or how loud it would become when I felt overwhelmed.

If you want to stop the struggle, you have to deal with those lurking thoughts.

Journaling, positive affirmations, therapy (my go-to), whatever you choose, just do it. Feeling stressed can make it hard to concentrate and reinforce feelings of overwhelm. That’s the last thing you need when you’re trying to get on track.

Common Wisdom Isn’t Always So Wise

I was an avid believer in writing a little everyday. I still am. Lots of writers have heard that scheduling time for writing and sticking to it religiously are the keys to a successful career. I don’t disagree with that — in general.

The issue is that some writers stick to this advice so rigidly that it creates serious problems. What if you have a day — or gasp — two, where you just can’t make it happen? Not because someone is sick, or because there’s a family emergency, or because some thing else has happened that makes it easier not to feel guilty. I’m talking about those times where you have the full day ahead of you and you just know that you’ll have a fantastic writing day. But the flow just won’t go.

My advice: ignore the common wisdom and give yourself a damn break. Those books on having a successful career as a writer are about precisely that. Being a writer. But writing is only one part of our lives. And when we’re feeling overwhelmed, it can take tremendous energy to get started and get anything done (if you’re lucky). The best thing you can do is soothe yourself on those days and remind yourself that it’ll get better.

My favorite pep-talk for myself: It’s disappointing when you want to get work done and you can’t, isn’t it? It even feels really scary. It’s great to recognize that. Maybe things will feel better later and writing will rev up then. If not, that’s okay too. There’s always tomorrow and your brain will be more rested.

If that feels weird, just imagine gently talking to a cat (or your fill-in-the-blank of choice). That’ll either make it easier or weirder. Either way, my pep-talk won’t sound so bad. See, now you can try it.

Ignore The Pillars, Pay The Price.

This feels almost silly to write, but if you’re feeling overwhelmed and having trouble working, treat yourself like a baby and figure out whether you’re ignoring the pillars: eating, sleeping, and drinking enough water. I can’t tell you how many days I’ve been on the struggle bus only to realize that it was because I desperately needed to have lunch. Or because I needed a nap. I always feel more clear-headed after a good nap. There’s science behind the power of a good snooze for improving our thinking too. So, when you’re wracking your brain trying to figure out how to deal with overwhelm, don’t forget to make sure that you’re not inadvertently making things harder for yourself by running on empty.

Good Luck!

There you have it. A few key things to help you stay well when you’re feeling overwhelmed while writing. You’ll make it to the other side. I know, because that book of mine comes out in August.

Thank goodness ping-ponging can be productive after all.